Republicans & Republican'ts

I've always secretly wished that voters would flock to the polls in November and, improbably, elect "Mickey Mouse," "Your Mom" and/or "Ponch from CHiPs" to the US presidency via a feverishly cynical write-in campaign.

Turns out, Your Mom has about as good a chance as anyone to at least win the Republican nomination. According to a new AP/Ipsos poll, the leading candidate for the GOP nod is currently "None of the above."

Ouch. Rudy G and Fred "Law & Order" Thompson are the closest to None of the Above (23 percent) at 19 percent, followed by McCain and Romney. Rudy has been in a free-fall since the Spring but McCain appears to be the one that's dead in the water, what with empty coffers and an exodus of campaign advisers. I'll bet that lipstick-smeared, Neo-Con face-lift isn't looking so pretty in the mirror these days.

The Dems,for now, are looking solid. But even with the toxic fallout from G-Dub coating all things Republican, Democrats always seem to find a way to shoot themselves. Nevertheless, the AP quotes University of Iowa poli-sci guy David Redlawsk as saying "Democrats are reasonably comfortable with the range of choices. The Democratic attitude is that three or four of these guys would be fine."

In case you're keeping score at home, Bill Richardson is probably the "or four" Redlawsk references. Despite his best efforts (see this week's "There's Something About Bill" in SFR), the Guv hasn't managed to cripple his campaign yet.

In the meantime, Big Bill is spending the first half of this week in New Hampshire at various "job interview" and "Women for Richardson" events. Tomorrow is an off-day, presumably to be spent in mental preparation for his "All Day" appearances on Thursday and Friday in Des Moines.

Give the man credit. Most people are ready to leave Des Moines after 20 minutes, let alone two full days. According to the latest campaign schedule, Richardson will spend Saturday in "Iowa" (no specific cities or events are mentioned, maybe it's a euphemism) before jetting off to South Carolina on Sunday in advance of the DNC Presidential Debate on Monday. That debate could be big (for better or worse) for the Richardson camp considering SC is the campaign's weakest early primary/caucus state to date.

But hey, at least he's not getting beat by None of the Above.